Difficult Conversations – A tool for framing difficult conversations

Published on 14th January 2018 in Leadership

The Tool

This tool can be used to address difficult situations or performance issues, such as a failure to deliver on a commitment. Before having a difficult conversation, it is important to be clear about the following:

• What is your purpose for having the conversation?
• What assumptions are you making about this person’s intentions?
• What ‘buttons’ (yours) are being pressed?
• How is your attitude influencing your current approach ?
• Who is your opponent/partner?
• What are your needs and fears? What are theirs?
• How have you contributed to the problem? How have they?

Four Steps to a Successful Outcome

The following is a model adapted from the work of Judy Ringer. It is a useful tool to employ when you need to have a difficult conversation with another person